Friday, July 9, 2010


Dear Robin,

Thank you so much for nominating me – yet again – for another award…this time for SUBSTANCE! What is that exactly? Substance? If it’s essence, meaning and form, then I cannot claim this award because I’m still struggling with these things. Thank you for thinking I have depth. Truth is, I’d much rather have height…to soar!

Anyway, for this award I’m supposed to sum up my blogging philosophy in five words, but because a picture says 1,000 words, I will use this:

A bee has more substance!

Did you know, Robin, that bees are responsible for 75 percent of the world's food supply? They play a critical role in the human food chain as the species is the primary pollinator of hundreds of types of nuts, flowers, vegetables and fruits. And yet, in recent years, beekeepers are returning to their hives only to find that their colonies have all but disappeared.

Theories for the cause of this collapse abound. Our cell-phone use (that has interfered with bees' navigation), our genetically modified organisms and newly developed pesticides have put bees under stress.

So we are - all of us without exception - pretty stupid, aren't we? Glad, I fooled you into thinking I had some substance, but the truth is, I can't fool myself...I, too, despite not owning a cell phone, am also an accessory to the crime of bee killing.

And here's a poem...

Can you see my dumbness?
Cloaked under degrees and big words.
People say, "How smart!"
But I am just a fart...
Without an ounce of dignity.
The pretence of a Purple Cow...
It's all a Hypocrisy!


The Man Your Husband Is Worried About said...

I've been misled! I thought this was where your blog would get all "edgy," like an independent horror film. Your post title is abusing the post's substance.

Robin said...

Madonna gave you the five words for your blog in her introduction and I think they are perfect: Inexplicable, Provocative, Infuriating, Ballsy, and Love. So There.

Purple Cow said...

Man whose wife should be worried about the man her husband is worried about...All I have to say is THIS - never judge a post by its title.

Robin - Madonna does not even know I exist...her doorman does not even know I exist...

Ro Magnolia said...

Hmmmm ... I found this definition of substance online at:

"Definition of Substance: Material with particular features..."

You, Purple Cow, are definitely a material with particular features. You are purple. You are a cow. You have a very large muzzle/nose in relation to the size of your ears. Or perhaps that is just the angle of the camera - not your most flattering photo, is it? :)

But apart from your astounding bovine features, you have other features as well ...
thoughtfulness, introspection, and compassion held taut by simmering anger and a fierce desire to love and be loved.

You may not always be comfortable with the substance of which you are made, but you are definitely a woman of substance my friend. And comfort, I have found, is highly over-rated. I'd much rather have friends who are interesting, alive, passionate and provoking, than friends who are just "comfortable" blobs without any noticeable features.

Purple Cow said...

OK...according to your definition we ALL have substance! So why have an award for it?

As for COMFORT...I don't know. It would be kind of nice to meet someone who is comfortable in their own skins...not smug...just comfortable. Nothing wrong with that, really!

Still, for people of substance, we are all quite lacking or else the world would be a more idyllic place. As idyllic as your blog posts, Ro...the ones with the pretty pergolas and romantic walkways.

George said...

Wow. You have some very erudite friends - I don't think I am in their league.

I especially like Ro Magnolia's

"...thoughtfulness, introspection, and compassion held taut by simmering anger and a fierce desire to love and be loved."

I was going to say that I don't really know you all that well... but perhaps I do.
Anyway, RM's comment sounds just about right... especially the 'fierce desire to love and be loved.'

You are an okay person.

Enjoy your weekend - George and Anna

Purple Cow said...

We are all OK people, George and Anna (Does this mean that you are Anna as well as George like I had guessed?). We are all OK until proven otherwise.