My fingers began to itch and before I knew it I dialled the magic number wondering what I would do were my friend not to answer. Thankfully, I did not not have to wait long for a response.
"Hello," I said.
"Hi!" I answered. "What's up?"
"Just wondering how you were?" I lied because I really just wanted to get it over with and tell my bit.
"No, tell me how you are?" I asked. "If, of course, you know."
"Well, that's just it," I told myself, relieved to be so understood. "I don't know. I feel a void. Like there's a part of me missing. Could that part of me be you?"
"Nah, you don't really need me because you are me. But it does sound like you need to change something," suggested I.
Silence. That's about as far as the conversation got. We didn't even say goodbye. It wasn't necessary.
4 comments:
My first thought was this: I feel like John Cage needing to take a moment. And then I thought, "She isn't going to know what that means." He was a character from the TV show ALLY McBEAL, FYI. My next thought was that we all feel voids. Most people just don't talk about them. It is nature's way to fill a space. The essence of the thing is what you decide to put in there. Pick something that makes you happy.
at first i thought you were going to call a hotline. hey, you didnt say this friend was obliged to stay with you while money came and went.
I know for myself, the two "me's" are
1) the one who is only concerned with how school, work, & health are going and
2) the one who knows that even when #1 is happy, that Me as a whole is still not necessarily happy, damnit!
Glad you were brave enough to make the call...maybe try Skype next time (aka set up the camera so it's you staring back at yourself). We really cant lie to our "friend" when they can see our face.
Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
smilecat
Robin - I googled John Cage...I have heard of Ally McBeal because people at my office compare our toilets to the show.
Propoquerian - I am over 40 - my hotline days are over. the line is dead and cold...
Smilecat - We like to call it "blog therapy"...Robin gives it a daily dose at a time.
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